Of all the fears that eat away at our confidence, the fear of failure is the most discouraging. It leads us to avoid challenges, to steer clear of anything that might involve risk, or to give up at the first sign of difficulty. At its most extreme it paralyses us. We wait until we can be assured of success before we are prepared to make a move. Such certainty is never forthcoming, and as a consequence we venture nothing, achieve nothing, feel bad about ourselves and spend our lives bemoaning what might have been. Now I’m sure this extreme description does not fit you, but there is a little of it in most of us. So let’s take a few minutes to consider the fear of failure and how we can work to overcome it.

Failure carries a very personal label. Our fear is that if we try something and fail, we will be in some way less worthy as human beings. We see ourselves not as people who have experienced failure, but as failures! It’s easy to see why. The pass/fail judgement has been dangling over our lives since early childhood. Passing the test offers a gateway to whatever we have set out to do while failure leaves us out in the cold. The truth is that people consistently labelled ‘successes’ or ‘failures’. But isn’t it ironic that in an effort to avoid the failure label we shrink from the very challenges that could lead to success? All the time that we sit in our comfort zones and dream, we can convince ourselves that we have the potential to succeed. Our fear is that, as soon as we set foot outside and put ourselves to the test, we will be found wanting.

The truth is that everyone experiences failure at some time and that it is those who do not fear it who are able to learn from it and move on. One of the most important lessons about confidence is that in order to win, you must dare to lose, and that means having the courage to step outside the comfort zone.